a witness

The American Heritage Dictionary defines the word witness as - to be present at or have personal knowledge of; to take note of; observe; to testify to. I think this is significant when I think about how the following quote relates to our lives.

I don't know how many of you have seen the movie Shall We Dance? Read about it here. My favorite and most redeeming moment in the movie is just this quote that Susan Sarandon's character (Beverly Clark) shares, which to me is very powerful, moving, and true. She simply says -

We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'."

I know quite a few of my closest friends are not married, so I don't want to be like I'm holding up marriage as the end-all of being a witness to someone else's life. I think all my friends are different witnesses to my life just as I am to theirs. And, I think that idea of being a witness is an incredible idea - we all are witnesses to at least a handful of lives (I hope) everyday and what do we do with all those opportunities to minister, to be a friend, to share a lunch, to just give a genuine hello and ask a genuine "How are you?", to give a smile or encouraging word, etc....

But, there is something to be said about the fact that I live with my husband, in the same little apartment with three cats - he sees it ALL, even when I don't necessarily want him to. And, because of the vows we made to one another before God and several witnesses, we promised all those things she talks about - to care about everything. I'm very comforted in that someone has promised to come as close to me as any human person can and has allowed me to come close to him as well - to see the all the good, the bad, the ugly, the mundane, to share the excitement, the joy and the sorrow of our lives and to do it for the rest of our lives. My husband and I have become maybe each other's primary earthly witness to our own lives and that is an incredible thought to me! I have to admit that I also ocassionally have the feeling of wanting to hide because I realize that even when nobody else sees, more than likely (though not always), my husband will - and trust me, he sees a lot that noone else ever has and it ain't always pretty!

And, then, if I can take it one step further - I'm ultimately reminded when I think of this quote and travel down the thought process it takes me on that Christ has taken notice of all of us, came close to us and invited us to come close to Him. He is witness to our every thought and is and will be our witness before God of the faith we have and the lives we've lead, whether "good" or "bad." Now, that's something to think about!

Anyways....a very cool quote, I think. I'm really interested to see what anybody out there thinks about it.

Narnia-itis!

Well, like Ann, I have to admit that I have Narnia-itis! I have read through all but the last two books of the Chronicles and they have been incredible! I never knew I could enjoy or be as moved by books of fantasy as I have been by these ones!

As well as the books themselves, I have recently discovered a CD that is called "Music Inspired by The Chronicles of Narnia - The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" and it has been just as moving as the books! (And, I must say that for a compliation CD, I haven't found too many that are entirely as enjoyable as this one has been for me.) There is one particular song that has begun to really grow on me and the lyrics go like this -

I heard Your song coming over the hill. I know it seemed like the world stood still. You were singing a melody that caught me by surprise. Yeah, it sounded familiar to me like I'd known it all my life.

And, I keep looking down as I move in closer. My heart is racing now with fear and wonder. Could I come back to You, so long on my own. From where I am I know this is not my home.....

You're the One I believe. A king, a friend has always been holding on to me. You're the One and I have seen Your life and death, the endless breath breathing into me. Just the mention of your name and I know, I know I found love. Cause You're the One.

I think the part that strikes me very personally is the part that talks about "a king, a friend has always been holding on to me." I am in awe of Christ's power to be my king and my friend at the same time and also to always keep a hold of me. I know that I may travel far away from Him in my heart, but He will never let me go.

The beginning of the song just reminds me of a specific part of the story - the picture of a song coming over a hill, a song that seems so familiar you feel like you've known it all your life and it catches you by surprise to know that someone else not only knows it but is also the composer, lyricist, and singer all in one. That's just beautiful to me. I love the idea of God singing over us, like in Zephaniah 3:17, where it says -

The LORD your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing.

These books, while fantasy, have given me a new glimpse of the great romance God has for us. They're wonderful!

work, interrupted

Today I had lunch with a wonderful, dear friend. She made me yummy lasagna, bread, salad, and a blueberry pie that makes me long for my dear late "Aunt Margie's" big backyard of a blueberry patch in Maine. I'm so glad for days that are so simply beautiful - just good, hard work, lunch and fellowship with a good friend, a fall day to relish in (fall and spring are by far the best driving-with-the-windows-down seasons), a reminder of the gift that life is and a preview of coming attractions.

Thank you, Jesus, for this beautiful day and I mean it from the depths of my lonely-for-home heart.

a new beginning

As I'm embarking on the beginning of a new chapter in my journey of faith, I thought a way of expressing, sharing, and just generally opening up my life would be an incredible place to start! So, here I am, and it is pretty cool!

I'm in the process of going back to college, and getting to this point of a serious pursuit and a clarity of exactly why and for what purpose I am going back to college is a big deal for me. Christ recently used a great mentor, who probably doesn't even realize that he is, to challenge me to name something - an attitude, a thing, a relationship, etc. - that has defined me or held me back from a fuller relationship with God. I have to admit that, at first, I didn't feel the need or the want to. I honestly felt at that moment, "I can't think of anything right now, so I'll pray about it and think about it later." However, most often Christ has other plans and I couldn't seem to escape the feeling that I shouldn't ignore the challenge being presented to me. I have no doubt that it was He who brought to my mind exactly what has the power to define me and hold me back. It was a painful thing to write it down, but I remember writing it down in small letters and I'm glad I did. Nothing, no matter how big it seems, is bigger than God or His power to accomplish His will in our lives! I'm glad to know I serve a BIG God.

So, in the process of recognizing this small word that has held me hostage in its grip, Christ has loosened its power over my choices and how I live this life I've been given. And, in doing so, I've come to realize that Christ is leading me back to college, which in itself holds many obstacles and a little anxiety for me. But, I'm telling you what, I'm ready for the adventure that I've kept myself from for so long - not only in pursuing college, but just enjoying my life! I can't explain or express how excited I am to be on this journey, with a renewed hope and clarity.

I have that feeling like I can finally catch my breath and come back into the light a little bit..............